Sometimes I think I make ministry more complicated than it has to be. Don't get me wrong, planting churches in the inner city is hard and often frustrating work. In fact, it might be the most difficult task I'v ever encountered (with the exception of rearing a child, of course!).
But at times, I make it more complicated because I make it about me. I worry about how I am going to reach all these lost and hurting people. I get overwhelmed by the enormity of it all and this mission begins to seem like Mt. Everest- an insurmountable peak looming in the distance, filled with jagged rocks and hidden crevasses. And dare I mention, the path to the summit is lined with bodies?? (Daren has been watching Everest documentaries lately-interesting but somewhat disturbing).
Then, I stop myself and remember this: I am not responsible for the salvation of my neighbors. I am not the one who will birth a church in my community. The Lord will do these things in His timing- not mine. My responsibility is to be obedient to what He calls me to do. Right now, He is calling me to be faithful and wait on him. For someone who is a doer to the core, this is a discipline that is definitely stretching me. Unless I am actively "doing" something in my neighborhood, I feel like a bad missionary (whatever that means).
But lately, the "doing" has looked different. Currently, Daren and I are between church plants. We are waiting on the Lord's timing for our next church planting assignment. In the mean time, I am up to my elbows in other ministry projects. Because of that, my time in the community has decreased some and I have been feeling guilty. Once again, I felt that I should be doing something meaningful. Then I realized I already was. Three-four mornings a week, Jackson and I take a walk through our neighborhood. During those walks, I pray. I say prayers for those living in our community. Some I know by name, some I don't. I pray that the Lord will break down strongholds of addictions and abuse. I pray for His miraculous love and His all-encompassing light to penetrate the darkness. Jackson and I wave and say "hello" to those we meet. He is quite popular with most the neighbors and kids. :) I am also available for the many kids who stop by our house to hang out or play in the backyard.
I know these simple things do not seem like much, but there is a season for everything. Right now, I am in a season of simply showing love to those God brings along my path and praying fervently for my community. The Lord, not me, will bring change and hope to this neighborhood. He will establish His church- I am just a willing vessel to be used for His purposes. My responsibility is to let Him guide me up this humanly insurmountable mountain- placing one foot in front of the other- knowing that with Christ all things are possible.
